Day 51 Everybody's Working for the Weekend

...or is it "It's Friday," or maybe "Saturday Night's Alright"?

Whatever it is, it is the weekend!

Yay!  So, what are you going to do this weekend? What are you going to try that is different, that will shake up your status quo?


Last weekend, I was successful in a few things: cleaning out some unwanted furniture, culling books from overcrowded book shelves.  This weekend I'm going to tackle a bit of the closet, not as a goal, but working a system.

Tomorrow is hanger day.  I've four major closets in the house, and most of them have extra hangers in them.  A lot of them are the hangers you pick up from the dry cleaners. I'll be ripping the paper off those and then disposing of the flimsy metal in my recycling bin (paper is going there too).

Another system I'm going to work is the yard. Or more specifically, the flower box on the side of the house yard.  There are some flowers that manage to struggle through the weeds and grass to bloom. My plan is to help them out a bit this year by cleaning the weeds and grass out of the flower box.

  There are actually two of them, one on each side of the door that leads into the garage.  I'll be bringing along a timer and spending ten minutes cleaning out the box furthest east and working my way west.  I don't know how many days that is going to take but, every weekend day that it is warm and not doing some sort of wet weather (we've been known to get snow here in time for Mother's Day), I will be spending ten minutes working on those beds.

When I make those look presentable, aka weed and grass free, I'll move on to another bit of outdoor work.  Without the pressure of a time sensitive goal, I'll develop a habit of working in the yard every weekend. Considering how little I did last year, whatever I do will make things better.

Now all these things don't sound much like dangerous living, I'll grant you that. However, all these things represent activities I don't want to face.  Maybe there is some secret, hidden fear deep in my psyche that is waiting to pounce.  I don't know, but whatever has been hindering me I am going to slowly wear down, like water running down granite for thousands of years.  Eventually, those closets will be cleaned out and those memories or fears, or whatever they are will be faced and put away.

But, I am also dedicating myself to business school. I have decided that the demise of my job is actually a hint that I can pay attention to and act on.

I want to start a business. Perhaps a writing business, or a mentoring business of some sort, or perhaps a business with a brick and mortar face.  So, I begin doing my advanced studies this weekend.  Now, this is preparing for a risk - finding out what would be a good fit for me and my goals, along with developing a business plan and stepping forward into the unknown, rather like Indiana Jones taking a leap of faith in the third Indiana Jones movie (Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade).

Climbing mountains is scary and exhilarating all at the same time. I suspect that is why a lot of people do it. But, it is tangible, a reality you can see with your eyes and feel with your feet and hands. You can smell the dirt and dust, and the scent of your own body as your adrenaline pumps while you traverse a particularly difficult precipice.  

Climbing the mountains of your mind is even more frightening. The risks are not immediately tangible. There are no ropes to tie you in place. You rise or fall based on your own merits, tenacity and fortitude. There are precious few anchors and footholds. There are a few, precious few,  you can trust to have your back, to keep you ascending, to guide you to success.

Part of my year of dangerous living is laying bare my life - the successes and failures, the encouragement, and the need for encouragement, the tragedies and the triumphs. I'm exposing myself to judgment, ridicule, to embarrassment.  That is totally dangerous. One hundred percent dangerous.

So, as I prepare for business school, I'm a bit wary. Do I have what it takes at this age and time of my life? Can I keep up with the younger crowd and their innate ability to use technology? Will I have the fortitude and the energy to complete my assignments with the straight A mentality I tackled undergrad with?

I don't know.  I think I do, but nothing is guaranteed.  I made it through a year of working out, realizing the past ten of those months I was hampered with a broken foot and going through the various stages of diagnoses through healing. Tomorrow, I am going to find out how much of what I physically did I was able to maintain.

I hope to be pleasantly surprised, but I just don't know.

I do know that finding out if I gained or lost ground physically is scary.  I also know, I need to know where I am at right now in order to move forward, even if it might be over the same ground.

Facing the fears, silly or well-founded are all a part of this year of dangerous living.

So what if I start with dumping some furniture, old books and clearing out the useless hangers in my closets?  I just know if I apply the systems I have and am developing, I should not be in the same place on Day 265 that I was on Day 1 or Day 51.

So here's to dangerous living, closets, climbing, and career choices.